Many people, when they hear about the idea of doing retreat, feel so happy. “If I can do retreat I will be stress-free. I will have a lot of time for peace and joy. And then, my meditation will develop very quickly.” Ideas have a lot of fantasies inside. Is this the right kind of expectations? If you want to do retreat, should you have those expectations or not? My answer is, “Not.” These ideas are not so good ideas. Normally, we say that when you do retreat, at the beginning, good motivation is really important. “I want to do retreat to be able to benefit. Of course, myself, and by helping myself, I will be able to help my friends, family, colleagues, society, the world, and all beings.” That motivation is important. Do not think, “I will be in retreat and it will be fantastic! I will transform right away, and I will have joy and peace and all these things.” If you have these kinds of expectations and do retreat, then your retreat will not be so wonderful — you will be disappointed. Therefore, normally, we say, do not have too high expectations. Let go of these expectations.
So, what should you expect? “I will do this retreat…” in Tibet, what we call, “Tsam.” As you enter this special boundary, 30% of negative actions will not happen, because you are away from the objects of negative emotions and actions, right? That is already great! You need to really appreciate even a tiny transformation, a tiny virtue, tiny things that are related to non-violence and other things, related with kindness and compassion — you just appreciate this. “That would be good. As long as I am not making negative actions, as long as I am not on purpose harming others, that would be great!” That is the kind of motivation. Just an appreciation of the basic things, and then go to retreat.
Then, if you can do some things even better, you will have more appreciation, you will have more feelings of inspiration. You will not be afraid of this waterfall experience. In fact, the waterfall experience is a good sign. You have to recognize that the waterfall experience is a good sign. This is also a really important motivation when you begin to do retreat.
If you do retreat together with many people, sometimes the monkey mind projects onto your friends and colleagues in the retreat. “Maybe he does not like me today? Today he said, ‘Huh huh! a little bit stronger than yesterday. That means that he is sending me some kind of signal that he does not like me.” Or, “My friend slammed the door, very strongly. I think he does not like me.” These things might appear sometimes when you practice. But, these are part of the waterfall experience. Let it be, let go, and it will go away. You will have joy, peace, and the experience of clarity. After some time later, that will not last. Then, dullness, agitation, and these things come back again. It goes up and down, up and down. Eventually, it will become better, and better, and better. Therefore, have the right motivation, and when you do retreat do not expect too much, and do not give up.
This is really important.