Many Westerners are inspired by the life story of Milarepa, but sometimes it turns into discouragement because we might think that we are not good enough, that we do not have a strong, determined mind, like Milarepa, or that we do not have enough wisdom or faith.
How should we deal with this feeling — when Westerners cannot really do or follow their teacher’s example or how the great lineage masters did it in the past?
I think Milarepa said:
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Those of my followers in the future, you might think all this that I did — the training, retreats, and various hardships, like spending many, many years in the mountains and going through all these hardships — this is impossible.
— Milarepa
Some people think, “Normal people cannot do that, because Milarepa was a special emanation of the Buddha.” or something like that. “We have to take care of our families, and we have this everyday life so we cannot achieve liberation.” Some people think like that. Milarepa said:
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The most important thing is our mind. For a mind that is really focused on meditation and focused on the dharma, the outside circumstances do not matter much.
— Milarepa
Milarepa said that there are four possibilities: (1) Doing retreat in the mountains, but the mind is in the city. So, your mind is busy and involved in aversion and attachment and all these things, but the body is in the mountains; (2) the body is in the city or town but the mind is in the mountains; (3) both together — the body is in the mountains and the mind is in the mountains; (4) neither — both the body and the mind are not in the mountains. These are the four possibilities.
One possibility is that the body is in the city, but the mind is in the mountains. What is the meaning of the mind being in the mountains? The meaning is that you are practicing meditation in everyday life. Sometimes we call this, “Enlightened without cutting the hair.” The meaning is that you do not have to become a monk or nun, and you do not have to go to a cave. You do everything, just like in a normal life, but you need to practice.
How to practice in the beginning? You have to practice short times many times, little by little. You need to change your habits, in the beginning. When it comes to changing habits, we cannot change huge habits, right away. If a train goes forward very fast and you would like to change the direction, first, you need to slow down, right? You need to slow down and you change little by little. You cannot change right away, like this (Mingyur Rinpoche turns his hand 180 degrees.) You change little by little, and then you can change the whole habit. It is similar to that.
We have very strong habits from everyday life, the monkey mind is continuous, so we cannot change this experience right away. If you have the opportunity to go to the mountains and at the same time the mind is in the mountains, this is wonderful. But if you cannot do that, there are still opportunities. You can still get liberated. Especially, when we really consider transformation, sometimes when there are good qualities, you can transform even within a short time. Sometimes we say:
“Seven days of retreat with very good quality
Is equal to maybe one year of retreat.”
Sometimes it can become like that. I have seen that. Sometimes people do retreat and the mind is all over the world and they do not really know or they are not really engaged, so even if they finish long-term retreat, they have not changed much. But some people went to retreat for one week, and after one week they completely changed. So the quality matters. Time does not really matter, and the environment does not really matter.
For me, when I was in retreat, for the first few months I was lazy and busy. Although my body was in retreat — my body was in the mountains — but my mind was not in the mountains. My mind was together with my panic and laziness and went around the world (Mingyur Rinpoche laughs.) During these few months, I did not improve much. But later I really tried to put in an effort, only for a few days, and these few days really changed my life. I had panic, so I really practiced with the panic, I really put my heart into the practice, and these few days really helped.
Do not worry too much about if you do not have the opportunity to go to the mountains. You cannot do it like Milarepa, but you can do it in a different way. You can make your home a mountain. You can make your city the mountain. You will have the opportunity to get liberated in your lifetime. To become Buddha within one lifetime might be quite difficult, be honest, but what we call, “direct realization” (is possible.) You can achieve direct realization in one life, which is wonderful, and many people these days are achieving that direct realization in one life. I have seen in my village, in Nubri, old grandpas and grandmas, their faces filled with a smile, and they are using prayer wheels (Mingyur Rinpoche pretends using a prayer wheel.) They say:
“If I die tomorrow, that is OK.
If I live long, that is OK.”
They are full of joy. That is possible.