The easiest mistakes are kind of like being lazy. We have this habit, the habit of not doing retreat, and when you do retreat, this is something new and a big change for you. To build up this new habit is not so easy. Say you are doing four sessions per day, it is not so easy.
In the beginning, you might have a lot of enthusiasm, but after some time you will lose it. Then, when you do retreat you suddenly go off track, you grab your phone, read books, and maybe nowadays surfing on your phone or watch television. In the ancient times, they were painting thangkas or making clothes. So these things easily come in retreat, it is an easy mistake to make. Therefore, you need to stay with a structure. If the sessions are too long, you have to make them shorter and do more of them.
There are other mistakes like being attached to meditation experiences. When you do retreat, your meditation experience becomes better and better. You will have more clarity and bliss, feeling blissful, peaceful, and joyful — all of these things — and experience a non-conceptual state of mind. You might feel like, “OK. Now I have achieved a high level of realization.” or you think, “From now on, I will have no problems with negative emotions or monkey mind (or whatever you want to call it). I am completely free and liberated.” These are attachments. You might be stuck in these meditation experiences, being attached to these meditation experiences. This is another easy mistake to make.
Sometimes, you even know that you should not get attached to the meditation experience, but you cannot really help it. It is not so easy. That is OK. One important thing is to make room for mistakes. When you do retreat, you will not meditate in the four sessions from beginning to end, it is impossible. A lot of things will happen: you will get lost, the quality will not be good, after some time you will not know what you are doing, and then the waterfall experience with these negative emotions comes.
When I was young and did retreat I one time did a retreat here — now I am in Osel Ling monastery — I wanted to do retreat for one week in Osel Ling monastery and at that time my father was in the Ka Nying monastery, near the big stupa in Nepal, in the Eastern part of Kathmandu, and I was here in the Western part of Kathmandu. So, I was with my father in the Eastern part of Kathmandu, and I told my father that I was going to do retreat for one week and I came here to Osel Ling monastery. In the beginning, my meditation experience was so wonderful. I was very clear, I was so happy and joyful, and I felt like, “Finally! I am in the right place, with the right circumstances, under the right situation.” everything was just right. Then, on day three this bliss, joy, and whatever else felt right was completely gone, the wonderful experiences that I expected were completely gone. Then my mind became very dry and I could not get a taste of meditation. It became dry and I did not know what I was doing. My mind became foggy and as soon as I started my meditation sessions it became like this (Mingyur Rinpoche pretends to fall asleep). That one was quite bad so when I had finished the one week I felt so happy (Mingyur Rinpoche laughs). So that retreat did not go very well.
Some days your retreat might not go so well either. Even if your retreat does not go so well, try your best, and it is OK to fail. Failing is the mother of success. Whatever we do, in the beginning, we might fail. When you look at very successful people, they are the ones that fail the most in the beginning. They fail more because they try more. “This does not work. That does not work. Here it does not work.” but in the end, when one thing works well, they become very successful. It is the same thing with retreat.
Do not be attached to meditation experiences. Do not expect your retreat to be wonderful and fantastic. Try to stay with a structure without mixing it up too much, but within the meditation sessions, you can change (method) from time to time. That is OK. No problem.
These are all easy mistakes to do on retreat, and many people do make these kinds of mistakes, and after that, they feel discouraged. Some of this is normal, it is part of the waterfall experience. If you do retreat, sometimes it might be like that. Instead of being discouraged, you have to appreciate it, “Wow! Now my mind has become crazier than before and I think more than before. How nice! My mind has become very dull. How nice!” You can appreciate it the other way around. Then it will give you a lot of inspiration and the next retreat will be better.